Thursday, December 07, 2006

Thursday Thirteen #18

Thirteen Thoughts About The Christmas Season

1. Buy your kid a Wii instead of a PlayStation 3. The PS3 is almost impossible to find under $1000, and besides, there are reports of injuries from using the Wii hand-held controls BECAUSE YOU ACTUALLY HAVE TO MOVE BODY PARTS TO USE IT AND PLAY GAMES. (Gasp!, Oh the Humanity!) A video game that makes you move. What'll they think of next?

2. No. Christmas season isn't starting earlier and earlier each year. It's just your increasing age. I'm serious. I have a theory: When I was a kid, Christmases seemed at least three years apart from one another, but once I was the one who had to pay for Christmas, they got a lot closer together. Now that I'm in my mid forties, Christmas seems to happen at least three times a year. I'm an engineer and should be able to whip up some calculus, a differential equation, or something to prove that, but I won't. Just trust me, ok? I distinctly remember Mr. Archer, who owned the Vidalia, Louisiana OTASCO store clearing out a couple of rows every October to put in Christmas toys. This was a very important signpost in my life each year, and that was the late 60's and early 70's folks. Nope, you're just getting older.

3. If you put Christmas lights outside your home such as those white, icicle lookin' ones, either have them ALL blink, or NONE blink (all on). Comprende, Amigo? It's annoying when one little three foot section of your otherwise nicely done lights blink.

4. How come those pre-lit trees don't work very long? I've read about so many people who have them and only lasted two or three years.

5. Christmas in Florida. I don't mind warm weather at Christmas, but I do like to drive through neighborhoods where most everyone decorates their houses and yards. There aren't a lot of areas like that down here. Bummer.

6. I despise that Santa Baby song. Especially the one by Madonna. It was one of the first songs I heard this year. AND, I despise any and all Christmas songs by Barbara Streisand. That version of Jingle Bells by her is. The. Worst. Christmas. Song. Ever. Thankfully I haven't heard it on the radio yet. AND, I despise that Santa Clause Is Comin' To Town by Bruce Springsteen. He sounds as if he were having "intestinal issues" while singing it.

7. I find myself looking at music store sites, looking at and pricing guitars. Fact is, I need another guitar about as much as I need another hole in my head. In times past, I would get guitar stuff for Christmas because it was the only time I could justify the expense, and I have cheap taste. Now it's silly, because I've gotten out of the habit of practicing regularly, and there's NO justification for a new one.

8. From the time our girls could walk, Lovely Wife and I would take them every November to Toys-R-Us and walk up and down every isle so they could see all that was available, so they could start telling us what they wanted for Christmas. But in reality, it was done just as much for me to see what toys were out that I might have gotten if I were still a kid. I miss doing that. Heck, I miss looking through Christmas catalogs.

9. As I get older, I find that I like gentle, instrumental Christmas music more and more.

10. I love to come home from work, kick back in my recliner, turn on some soft Christmas music and watch the Christmas tree lights twinkle in an otherwise dark room. No TV. Of course, we have four poodles in the house, so I'm immediately draped all over in dogs before I can even get the chair kicked all the way back, but that's ok. I'm glad to see them too.

11. 'Tis the season for rednecks in Walmart. Lovely Wife and I were at Walmart the other night, and there were so many redneck lookin' people, I thought I was back in Louisiana. I almost needed a tissue. (sniff, sniff) I'm not talking your normal, upper-crust, double-wide dwelling rednecks; there were lots of old-school, single-wide dwellers this night. One family's little boy had a mullet straight out of 1985. I'm talkin' a mullet almost as good as Joe Dirt's mullet. I'm not messin' with ya either. Lovely Wife and I saw it at the same time and gave each other that "hey, check out that kid's hair" facial expression at the same time. It's scary how couples start thinking alike after so many years together. (Jeesh I love Walmart. There are fewer and fewer places I can go in this world where there are people that make me look good.)

12. The year we moved here, we took Lovely Wife to one of The Magic Kingdom's special Christmas thing-a-ma-jigs for her mid-December birthday. It was a complete wonderland, and was a truly magical night. Disney can do Christmas really well. I'll never forget it. It seems impossible that that evening was ten years ago this month. I wish I had the spare money for all of us to go again this year. Hoping to leave for my first visit to Louisiana in five years the day after Christmas though, so we need every dollar we can scrounge up for that. (Hmmm. I wonder how much a pint of plasma will get me these days?)

13. I'm so blessed. I have always been home on Christmas mornings. When younger, I had to work evenings many times, but wouldn't have to leave for work until 3pm or so. By then, the damage was done, and the girls didn't seem to mind me leaving. Where I work now, we only get 5 holidays through the year, the company banks the rest for us and lets us have the whole week of Christmas off, barring an urgent situation, of course. So most years I've been here as an engineer, I've had at least Christmas Eve through January 2nd off. I fully realize that many people aren't so fortunate. My Dad missed several Christmases while working on off-shore oil drilling rigs. I still remember the look on his face when he would leave just before Christmas.

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


Gail Martin said...

This is such a well thought out TT that I totally enjoyed reading it.

Colleen Gleason said...

Thank you so much for letting me know I'm getting older. ;-)

This was a great list--very funny, and very true. I never worked for a company that gave us the whole week between Christmas and New Year's off, but now that I'm self-employed, I of course take it off every year.

Thanks for coming by my TT!

Starrlight said...

Great list!

Heather Smith said...

Great 13! And I totally agree about the mullets in Walmart! Too funny! My cousin jokes about starting a "mullet ministry" where she teaches people to cut their hair in a normal way! LOL!

Dixiechick said...

What a wonderful read! I'm still laughing at the kid's mullet...

Yes, I agree..when I was a kid Christmas NEVER got it comes entirely too quick.

Thanks for coming by my TT! Happy TT to you!

Mom's Secret Life said...

Plasma starts out at $40 for your first two donations in Knoxville, TN. Don't ask me how I know this.

RYC: You are the only person I've ever heard of besides my bachelor uncle (great-uncle, actually) Luther who could smell dirt. Besides me. I mean, like smell it as a positive thing.

I hope you enjoy your trip to LA.

Bubba said...

Good gravy. Nothing like mullets at Walmart to make the season brighter. Great list!

Happy TT...and thanks for stopping by!

angela said...

Too funny..
But now I have Ertha Kitt singing Santa Baby in my head.
The one I hate most is Amy Grant singing, well anything, but mostly that Grown Up Christmas List song. ugh. fingernails on a chalkboard.

Interstellar said...

I avoid Wal-Mart like the plague. I feel dirty after I leave there. But it is always good for an 'oh-my-gawd-did-you-see-that' every now and then. My husband, however loves Wal-Mart. And I know exactly what you mean about knowing what your spouse is thinking. We haven't been married that long, and we already do it.

Our tree is in an area where I can't really enjoy it right now. My husband is going out of town. The tree will probably be moved when he leaves. Which means his recliner is going to move. Which won't make him happy. But it'll only be for a short time.

Happy TT.

East of Oregon said...

I really enjoyed reading your list. I laughed and giggled.. been to tired to do much of that lately, so THANKS!!

Dane Bramage said...

You are right on with #2. But it is not just Christmas. Remember when Summer Vacation was an eternity. Now that you work Summer just comes and goes. I still can't believe its December.

Thanks for visiting my Thursday Thirteen #22 Hat Tip Edition

Dane Bramage said...

Oh and I think there should be a law against non-Christians making Christmas albums. Babs should just shut up.

BTW I think you can get get more for your plasma up here in Ohio, if you donate twice in one week, plus they give you a bonus for eight donations a month. My sister has been working at the plasma place for over 20 years.

Teena said...

Ha! Great list!

Thanks for stopping by mine :)

Norma said...

You've given us a lot to think about, but i can most identify with #9.

Di said...

re: Christmas Music...and I know you don't frequent Starbucks...but the worst has to be Sarah McLachlan yodeling Christmas tunes at Starbucks in the morning!

Cindy said...

JAM, this is my first visit to your blog, and I LOVE it! I'm bookmarking it right now. Thanks for stopping by my TT.

Nathalie said...

I love your part about the songs, I know what you mean! There are some songs I love, and others just make me vomit (like 'do they know it's Christmas time at all)
I hope you have a great holiday though!
Thanks for visiting my TT!

~**Dawn**~ said...

we are in complete agreement on #3. as for #5, a green Christmas always strikes me as weird even though this is my 4th one in FL. #9 has its time & place, especially in a #10-like setting. have to admit i got a laugh out of the mental image of being "draped all over in dogs" though! =) and #12? i love WDW at Christmas. i live fairly close by & went over there the last two weekends. ::happy sigh::

thanks for stopping by my T13. =)